Tag: postaweek2012

Thoughts on My Political Leanings

~ K ~ 2 Comments

I took a Pew Research Center quiz that determined I was a New Coalition Democrat, or rather likely to be a member of the New Democrat Coalition. I’ve been on a journey to determine whether I am a true Democrat or whether I was just avoiding becoming a Republican because I see the tough road Black Republicans must tread. I’ve discovered that my political positions indeed do lean Democrat and here’s why:

  • Pro-gay rights. Give gays the right to marry. (Or simply give consenting adults the right to marry.)
  • I believe the way to reduce the debt is to cut spending and raise taxes. (I am dubious of any politician who promises reducing the debt without raising taxes.)
  • Anti-death penalty. Abolish the death penalty federally.
  • Give amnesty to illegal immigrants. Force them to pay taxes and graft them into a path to citizenship.
  • I believe there are still social inequalities for racial minorities that sometimes need government (state or federal) intervention.

Here’s why I thought I leaned Republican:

  • Anti-abortion. Abolish abortion except for extreme cases.
  • Religion is an important aspect of my life. I am a born-again Christian. (They tend to vote Republican.)
  • My household is financially well off.
  • I don’t believe businesses are generally evil. Most businesses seek to make a good and honest profit. (Now that I’m in business for myself, I understand the concept of profit a little bit better.)
  • Welfare should have term limits. After five years, able-bodied citizens should begin working at McDonald’s or be cut off from government benefits.
  • I think wars are sometimes necessary, although I am a strong advocate of extensive diplomacy. I am not isolationist.

Apparently, my so-called Republican leanings simply make me a centrist Democrat rather than a left-leaning liberal. According to the Pew Research Center, the following describes members of the New Democrat Coalition (estimated to be 10 percent of the public):

What They Believe
  • Strongly pro-government
  • Upbeat about the country’s ability to solve problems and an individual’s ability to get ahead through hard work
  • Approve of regulation and environmental protection
  • More positive about business than other Democratic-oriented groups
  • Generally liberal on racial issues
  • Hospitable to immigrants: 78% believe they strengthen society
  • Very religious and socially conservative
Who They Are
  • 56% are Democrats
  • Majority-minority group: 34% white, 30% black and 26% Latino
  • About three-in-ten are first or second generation Americans
  • 55% have only a high school education or less
  • 23% are not registered to vote
  • Only 34% read a daily newspaper
  • Half are regular volunteers for charity or non-profit groups

Exciting Times Ahead

~ K ~ 2 Comments

I’m in the midst of a busy season this July. Fresh off a fun weekend with my cousins who live near Washington, D.C., I’m back at work until Thursday evening when I go visit my other cousin who lives near Fort Lauderdale, Florida. I finished my 9-day proofreading stint at the advertising agency and registered with another advertising agency that may need my editorial services off-site.

I’m really excited about the new advertising agency as a client. It will help me to build my repertoire, hone my skills, and do what I love to do on a more regular basis while still being able to work at the library to bring in steady income.

 

Don’t Stop Believing

~ K ~ Leave a comment

I just finished 9-day stint at a contract job as a proofreader/editor. I’m sorry to say that I think I did a piss-poor job. I wish I could have talked to someone there about it, but alas, I was just the freelancer.

I worked full-time for 9 days and it has just about worn me out. My body is so used to working part-time that temporarily working full-time wreaked hell on my body. My sleep has gotten better, though, because I’m so exhausted at the end of the day.

Reading material on paper all day has made me not want to read books at the end of the day. My eyes are tired. I’m lucky to be even typing this.

I haven’t been able to do any deep thinking lately because all of my time has been occupied by working the daily 9-5 grind. I’m devoid of interesting things to say.

Working my contract job has made me wonder if I still have the chops to be a good editor. Whether I’m still cut out for editing and writing. Whether I’m good at anything at all any more. I feel discouraged about my career. If I’m not good at anything other than checking people in and out at the library, maybe I shouldn’t quit my day job after all.

Yankee in the Suburbs: Dispatches from an Unfinished Day

~ K ~ Leave a comment

I am a Yankee (through and through – New York, baby!) in the ‘burbs, writing about my day, thoughts, and blatherings. Continue reading “Yankee in the Suburbs: Dispatches from an Unfinished Day” →

Randomprocity

~ K ~ Leave a comment

So I’ve been silent on the blog, mainly because I have very little to talk about. I’m staying silent on politics because I’ve chosen to be willfully ignorant about the election because I don’t feel like losing friends over elections like I did in 2004 and 2008. To me, it’s just not worth it. (Although I have my uninformed opinions about things.)

Things are still quiet on the infertility front. A medical procedure needs to be performed and we’re waiting on our doctor to give the all-clear for it.

I’ve been exercising regularly for the past week and changing my eating habits, which has so far led to a 1.6-lb weight loss. Hoorah!

What I would really like to do, though, is write a story, but I just don’t have any ideas left in me. I’m consumed by reading a plethora of bad books (Fifty Shades, Phoenix Rising) and hoping that I can somehow conjure up a short story from somewhere inside me. Nothing doin’, though.

When I think of my relationships with my coworkers, it’s very formal and polite. I guess I’m not a casual, relaxing person. I wish I made friends much more easily. When I think of my cousins, they are considerate, thoughtful, and people-oriented.

Shame.

~ K ~ 4 Comments

I recently read a book by Ed Welch called Shame Interrupted. When I told my husband that I don’t really struggle with shame, he challenged me on this: “What about your legs?”

Touché.

The significance of the shame I have of my legs is that I have a condition called ichthyosis combined with eczema. Ichthyosis causes my skin to look pretty bad. In fact, it’s rough, scaly skin akin to that of a fish-like quality. You’ll never catch me wearing shorts or a short skirt without pantyhose outside of my home. That’s shame.

The reason I thought I didn’t deal with shame is because I viewed it as victimization shame, something I have limited knowledge of. I’ve been fortunate not suffer from any physical or sexual abuse so when I think of shame, I often think of the shame associated with being abused. But there’s shame that comes with being picked last for a team in school. There’s shame that comes when everyone knows you got passed over for a job. There’s shame that comes when you realize that you no longer fit into your old clothes because you’ve gotten too big.

So the more I think about it, the more I realize shame is a subject with which I am far too intimately acquainted.

Ed Welch suggests overcoming this a lot of this shame by recognizing Jesus took on shame for us when he went to the cross and died. When he rose again, he also conquered our shame. By trusting in him, we are made clean rather than unclean. We are consecrated rather than contaminated.

But I will probably still wear pants and long skirts.

Watching and Reading

~ K ~ 1 Comment

Recently, I watched a documentary on President Bill Clinton called American Experience: Clinton that I found simply fascinating. It’s amazing how much Clinton’s legacy would have changed had he not gotten involved in the whole Monica Lewinsky affair. I found Clinton to be a fascinating president who, no matter how much experience he had, could have not possibly been prepared for the demands of the office, but still somehow found a way to make tough decisions that weren’t really popular with either party.

I have been reading Eat, Pray, Love and find the book to be dreadful. This isn’t the first memoir that I’ve read (Mennonite in a Little Black Dress was better) so I’m surprised by how much I dislike the author who left her husband, engaged in an extramarital affair during the divorce process, and proceeded to bribe a customs official during her stay in Bali, Indonesia. I’m surprised the book was as popular as it was given that the author seems to be self-absorbed (more so in the first third of the book rather than toward the end). Although reading Ms. Gilbert’s tripe make me want to write tripe of my own.

On the other hand, I just finished Man in the Music about Michael Jackson’s music and artistry and found that to be insightful and intriguing. I’d recommend that book for anyone who is interested in Michael Jackson and his work. It’s a five-star book.

Mundane Blogging: Beta

~ K ~ 1 Comment

Today I went to work and had an uneventful day. I always look forward to coming home at the end of a long day.

I’m a little sad, though, because my favorite show, NBC’s “The Voice,” has finished its second season so I don’t have that to look forward to at the end of this long day. I may try watching “America’s Got Talent” if I’m really bored.

The weekend was nice. I had a good Mother’s Day with my mother and did my best to really focus on her. However, I couldn’t help feel sad throughout most of the day. One lady wished me a “Happy Future Mother’s Day,” and I thought that was sweet. I hope she’s right one day.

 

Mother’s Day

~ K ~ 2 Comments
Image Credit: David Castillo Dominici

My mother will be visiting for Mother’s Day, which I’m thankful for because it takes the sting out of a holiday that’s become painful in recent years.

In dealing with infertility, I am well too aware that I am not a mom and the normal, everyday of life of baby showers, pregnant women, and children remind me of this. I don’t have much to say on this topic except that it’s not the happiest or joyous occasion for every woman. Some women are crying over the fact that they have not been able to have children of their own—whether it be through adoption or natural childbearing.

When I started the journey toward having children, I never anticipated that the journey would be so long and arduous. It comes so easily and naturally for those who want it and those who don’t, why not us?

This is a time when I must remind myself to hope in God regardless of how I want to feel toward Him. Because I want to be angry. I want to be bitter. I want to blame Him for my barren womb. But I remember so many of the women who came before, especially Hannah, Samuel’s mother, and I try to remember their faithfulness to God. I want to not give up. I want to have hope. I want to hope because that’s part of my faith.

Mundane Blogging: Alpha

~ K ~ 4 Comments
Image Credit: Evgeni Dinev

It’s a shame that I’ve got this good ol’ blog that I don’t use or touch regularly. So perhaps I’ll try posting more mundane posts. Posts that I think no one really cares about. (Let’s see how long this lasts.) Oh, like, something that would qualify as a Facebook status update: Today was a nice day.

Wait, I’m already cheapening my own post.

In all seriousness, today was a relatively good day. I worked my 3-hour shift in the children’s section of the library and endured a 2-hour drive to and from Philly (with my husband) for a 15-minute appointment with my psychiatrist. Thank God my psychiatrist is so good he’s worth the gas.

My husband (J) and I stopped at Bed Bath & Beyond to return an item and purchase some new sheets since we just lost two to wear and (literal) tear. We also spent time bumbling around trying to remember what it was that we wanted to buy at BB&B but couldn’t remember. (To this moment, we still haven’t remembered.) Then on a whim, we ate at Anthony’s Coal Fired Pizza for an early dinner only to discover that the only chicken on the menu were their specialty wings. My husband can’t eat any meat other than poultry due to his gout so the lack of chicken as a topping option was a real letdown. We ended up having an eggplant pizza along with their chicken wings, which were both good.

In addition to attending Bible study tonight, I managed to send off my manuscript to two beta readers in the hopes that I’ll get valuable feedback soon.

Ah yes, my unpublished, completed manuscript. It is tentatively called Getting Right with God and is 19 chapters long and 315 pages wide with 92,538 words and a Flesch-Kincaid Reading Level of 5.2. (Only 2 percent of my sentences are passive!) Now, I need to format it so it follows standard manuscript format and prepare it for—the horror!—querying agents. And now the editor has turned author andI’m the one who needs to pay an editor to review my work.

Bonus of the Day: J gifted Norah Jones’s latest album, Little Broken Hearts, to me. It’s only $5.00 on Amazon in May 2012.

 

Why I Don’t Like Downton Abbey

~ K ~ 14 Comments

I work at the library and much ado has been made of the phenomenon that is Downton Abbey. At one point, there were 200 people (including me) waiting to discover why Downton Abbey was great. Well, I can tell you for all of the great raves about it, I was heartily disappointed. Why, oh why? (WARNING: Spoilers ahead.)

1. Mary, one of the main characters, isn’t very likeable. Mary is a central character, someone the viewer is supposed to feel sympathy for since she is the eldest and must marry her next of kin (a cousin) to inherit her estate and fortune. It’s a shame then that Mary comes off as dour and bitter, which makes me feel even less sorry for her state of affairs.

2. Edith, Mary’s sister, isn’t very likeable either. Edith is a very secondary character but she doesn’t invoke sympathy either. In fact, she is the scheming sister willing to take her sister’s leftover suitors if they’ll have her.

3. Cora, Mary’s mother, is like a white wall—there but uninteresting. Cora should be a character who is more interesting, especially since she ends up getting pregnant later on in the season, but it seems as if she’s more there to help events plod along rather than being a central party to them.

4. Thomas and O’Brien are pure evil. I know, I know. Not everyone can be as great as Bates, Anna, and Gwen and there MUST be some antagonists but I couldn’t even sympathize with their villainous behavior. Is Thomas mean because he’s gay and can’t come out publicly? Is O’Brien a bitch because she smokes? I’m making stuff up; I don’t have any idea. There’s nothing to help me figure out why these two act the way they do.

5. I could care less about the entail. To be honest, I didn’t even know what it was when I started watching the show and by part three, it had been mentioned so many times that I thought I ought to look it up in the dictionary. After I discovered what it was, I suddenly realized the show’s premise revolved around Mary (a character I didn’t like) and the entail. Considering that I didn’t care about the entail from the get-go and still didn’t as the show went on, I realized that the main premise of the show hadn’t sucked me in. That’s a fail for me being interested in a show.

6. I discovered I don’t care for period drama. This is probably one of my main issues. When Sybil (the youngest sister) buys a pair of bloomers and everyone looks at her in shock, I rolled my eyes. I had a hard time accepting the show for the time period that it was in, which isn’t the show’s fault. It just isn’t my cup of tea.

7. It’s a soap opera. One of Mary’s suitors dies after orgasm (it’s not explicit but implied) and Mary, Cora, and Mary’s maid Anna haul him back to his bedroom to be discovered in the morning. All I could think after seeing that was, “Really?” This happens in episode two or three of the season and I kept watching to see if it was a one-off episode or if the show would build off the events of “poor Mr. Pamuk.” (I especially feel even less sorry for Mary during the whole ordeal.) It turns out the show appeared to be heading in the direction of building off of the event, and I immediately realized I’d have to keep watching a show that was bound to get more and more far fetched as it went along. I gave up midway through season one.

Granted, the acting isn’t bad, the script isn’t terrible, there are some characters who are likeable. (Maggie Smith, of course, is excellent.) But with the combination of everything I outlined above, the show was bound to be a disaster for me. If you like Downton Abbey, congratulations. If you don’t, I’d love to hear from you and your reasons in the comments below.

P.S. I really, really wanted to like the show just because it’s been so hyped up. Le sigh. Thank God for BBC’s Sherlock.

Culture of Judgment

~ K ~ 2 Comments

I’ve been thinking that it’s next to impossible to be an American (or a Westerner for that matter) and not be judgmental. We pride ourselves on “judgmentalism.” With shows like American Idol, Survivor, and X-Factor, Americans play judge and jury on contestants. We are the civilized form of ancient Romans eagerly watching which contestant will dodge the tiger each week.

I am paranoid about people judging me. But as Jesus challenges me to pull the beam out of my own eye (Matt. 7:4-5), I find that not only am I judgmental but I encourage my judgmental attitude by watching TV shows that propagate the cycle. I cannot call others out for being judgmental when I am guilty of the same and expose myself to viewing that enables my sin.

I don’t know how I will be able to fully extricate myself from a culture of judgment. But I must ask forgiveness for my heart and try to remain pure so that a beam isn’t so badly poking my eye when I see this fault in others.

7 Ways I Enjoy Being Child-Free (Not by Choice)

~ K ~ 8 Comments
Image from childfreedom.blogspot.com

If you’ve been reading this blog for any length of time, you know that I struggle with childlessness. I have not willingly chosen to be child-free as some couples have. It’s just a matter of not having been blessed with children at this time. As my husband and I determine our next course of action, I recognize that there are benefits to not having children. There are things that I would be willing to give up if we are blessed with kids, but at this time, I might as well enjoy myself!

1. Waking up without having to tend to someone else’s needs.

If I plan to balance my checkbook for an hour, I don’t need to worry about anyone crying as he or she wakes up from sleep. I can go about my business as planned.

2. Eating out when I want to.

Although eating out regularly gets expensive, I’m not a fan of cooking. With a child, eating out will become a luxury because we wouldn’t be able to afford the extra expense and getting an active toddler to sit at a meal for a while would be a challenge.

3. No extra anxieties.

I’m already an anxious person. Can you imagine the anxiety I’d develop as I worry about a toddler trying to get into all the cabinets or climbing the dishwasher onto the counter? I’m not constantly freaking out about being put in jail because I failed to get the most secure lock on the cleaning products cabinet.

4. Traveling isn’t a hassle.

Travel and packing is already stressful for just me. Having to pack for myself and for another one might drive me insane. And if we’re stuck in traffic for 4 hours, we don’t need to pull over for anything except maybe refilling the tank. Oh, and I’m not that mom in the plane who everyone wishes would shut her kid up.

5. Earning money is rewarding.

Being a mom is a thankless job. So are a lot of other regular jobs but that paycheck is not thankless; it’s rewarding. Being a mom sometimes doesn’t feel so rewarding when you do the same things day in, day out without a thank you or any kind of paycheck. Right now, I feel like I’m contributing to my family in a way that yields instant rewards.

6. Relatively clean and intact items around the home.

We don’t have animals either so nothing has been pooped on, drooled on, or torn apart. The worst my books and furniture have to endure are dust and wear and tear. (Okay, maybe I scribble on a few things…)

7. Quiet.

No babies crying, no children pestering me with questions like “why” for everything, no teens constantly asking me for cash. If my husband is silent and I am not talking, it is quiet. I should relish this for as long as I can.

Again, these are things I am reminding myself to enjoy as I pursue a dream of having children. Is there anything else you can add that I’ve missed?