After deconstructing and finally reconstructing my faith, I’ve found a church 15 minutes away from me that is diverse (many races and ethnicities) AND inclusive (LGBTQ+ and others).

When I started my journey of looking for churches, all I came across were mainline churches primarily made up of white people. Specifically older, white people. I’ve been token Black person before and it was a role I did not like. Me having to count whether I was the darkest-skinned person in the room or if there was someone else like me.

I did Google searches like crazy trying to find a church that even looked diverse. A church that was openly LGBTQ+ affirming. I searched for months and just couldn’t find any place I wanted to visit.

Then my current church came up and I checked out their website. They had different races of people, different ages, different genders, and different sexual orientations. Not excluding any group of people was an important aspect for me. To not judge. Or rather, learn NOT to judge.

I began attending the 8:30 services, which felt like more of a cozy Bible study rather than a pontific church service. I had the opportunity to meet the senior pastor, the elders, the deacons, and the interns. The pastoral leadership looked as diverse as their website showed. No token people, good expository preaching, and hey!—a female pastor! Couldn’t get any better. Finally, when I felt comfortable enough at the church, I switched to the 10 o’clock service. I attended a few times before venturing to bring my kids with me.

My daughter loved it. She had never been around so many people. Especially those who sang and danced. She had fun picking up flags and waving it around during the worship time. But there’s a toddler room open and she enjoys being there, too. My son who’s going into third grade, sits with me during worship before he gets dismissed for children’s church. He’s uninterested in song worship so I usually have to take books along with me for him to read. But he seems happy to go to children’s church.

I’m slowly trying to become more involved with church activities. I am pretty nervous about putting myself back out there because there’s always the risk of getting hurt. And I’ve been burned by 2 churches and I don’t want to get burned by another one. I think if things went sideways with my current church, I probably would no longer attend church for a long time. Being vulnerable is a 2-edged sword: you can create some very good relationships but you can also get extremely hurt.

So here I am, trying to be vulnerable with my church (probably the last church I will be) and accept love, compassion, and care. From everyone there.