I’ve decided that for a while I’m going to write about things in my past. For example, when I was 17, I got involved with a 21-year-old college male. We never had a physical sexual relationship but now being a 38-year-old woman realize how odd and strange it was. From a teenager girl’s point of view, it was a dream—to be dating a college guy! Looking back as an adult, I realize how stupid I was. But teenagers don’t realize this. They just want to be grown up and they think the way of growing up is to get involved with an older guy. Especially college guys because college guys are cool.
I didn’t really have any trauma from it. He was a nice, sweet kind man and respected my boundaries. We did do some intimate stuff, probably stuff I shouldn’t have done as a new Christian, but it was exciting to do something different I’d never done before.
I remember his name. His full name. He has a unique Ukranian or Polish name so I’m sure any search results for him would pop up instantly. But I purposely haven’t looked him up. Would he remember the teenager from the 90s? And why of all things should I try to contact a man who thought it would be a good idea to date a teenage girl? I’ll always wonder what happened to him but I choose not to find out.
This Journey Is My Own 